The Liminal Man

Writings of a man born between worlds

A Morning Prayer

December 4, 2022

God, your brilliance lit each photon that has shined.
You wove spacetime. You framed the human mind.
Your might assembled every quantum mote,
and heaped up stars like sand, and formed my throat.
And though you’ve bound the universe with death,
today again you’ve filled my lungs with breath.
So speaking now, I kneel as I rise.
I place my hope in you. You hold my fate.
The Bible says you’re holy, loving, wise;
Muhammad says you’re merciful and great.
But me, I’ve never seen you with my eyes;
I only know to cling to hope and wait.
So lowly, weak, uncertain, full of sin,
I’ll worship, serve, and sing as if you’ll come again.

Notes:

Over the last six months I have begun to settle firmly back into a life of faith after over a decade of wandering and doubt. Yet still my faith is as much aspirational as it is rooted and confident. I’m confident God exists. I embrace the Bible as true. But deep down I’m not really sure it’s true. And yet I will continue to live and act as if it’s true in hope of the coming day when either truth will be revealed or perception will cease. (TLM, Dec. 4, 2022)

your brilliance — Omniscience; the mind that designed the universe is a mind beyond fathoming. But also glory.

You wove spacetime — I firmly believe that the mind that designed DNA must exist beyond the construct of space, time, and matter. I do not believe it could have arisen from within it.

the human mind — seemingly the pinnacle of biological creation, and increasingly the designer of artificial minds of immense power. Also the source of this poem. God gave me the tool with which to think of and speak to Him.

your might — Omnipotence; this second couplet is a close parallel to the first in form and content.

my throat — the organ of sound production. God gave the mind that formulates the words, and the voice to utter them.

you’ve bound the universe with death — No matter how technologically advanced humans become, they cannot outrun the laws of physics; they cannot escape the chains of space, time, and matter. The heat death of the universe will come. All within it will die. And of course, we each die.

my lungs — the bellows that power my voice. Mind, throat, lungs. The tools of prayer and praise.

breath — air, but also spirit

speaking now — this line at least is meant to be spoken aloud when praying this prayer

holy — Lev. 19:2; Isa. 6:3; 1 Pet. 1:6. The holiness of God is perhaps the most basic characteristic ascribed to God in both the Old and New Testaments.

loving — Psalm 136; 1 John 4:7-8. God’s loyal love for His people is perhaps the second most basic characteristic ascribed to God in both the Old and New Testaments.

wise — Prov. 3:19; Eph. 1:8-9. The wisdom of God is yet another critical Biblical attribute of God, so much so that Christians have traditionally identified the wisdom of God with Christ himself.

merciful — The Qur’an 1:1,3; the extreme mercy of God is strongly underscored twice in the first three verses of the Qur’an. These verses are uttered at least five times a day by every Muslim as a part of daily prayer.

great — Allahu akbar (“God is most great” or “God is greater”), the takbir, begins every Muslim call to prayer and forms the first words of each ritual prayer sessions through the day. It is also frequently used by Muslims in many contexts throughout their lives.

I can articulate many powerful reasons for not believing in any of the holy books we have. I can articulate many powerful reasons one ought to adopt one of these books as their life’s center and anchor. I can argue at length for the superiority of the Bible over the Qur’an and vice versa. I don’t have certainty. What I have is convinced theism and hope in God’s mercy.

cling to hope — That God has enabled me to walk in hope after all the years of doubt has been a great gift.

as if you’ll come — I cannot control if God is, who God is, or what He does. But in many ways Crassus’s line from Spartacus has become my touchstone: “It doesn’t matter. If here were no gods at all, I’d revere them.” The greatest—and really only—for me or anyone else in the end is the holiness, love, wisdom, mercy, and power of God.